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Marital Moments

The  topic  for today's  Marital Moments  will  be this important observation:  "Com-munication  Is Confronted  With Many Enemies".   If  you  have been  married  any length of  time  you  will  readily  recognize  these  enemies  in  your  own  life.  The book of James chapter three will continue  to be the  focus of  these lessons on com-munication.  Notice  the many enemies that  confront and  sadly  many times control the communication process. James 3:5 introduces us to  the first enemy.   There  the Bible states that,  "The tongue is a little member, and boasteth great things".   Notice the word "boasteth".   The tongue is selfish and egotistical.  A  great  enemy to com-munication is the selfishness of the one speaking.  Too often the one speaking wants his/her  own  way.  They don't want anyone, especially their spouse, to oppose their words or their arguments.   They don't want to  be told that they  are simply  wrong. They  "selfishly"  want to express  their points and views with neither discussion nor rejection coming from their spouse.  The second great  enemy  that  confronts  com-munication is found in James 3:6, "The tongue is...a world of iniquity".   The tongue is sinful. The communication moment is confronted by one's sinfulness. After Adam and Eve chose to disobey God and sin in the Garden of Eden,  man has experienced the awful  tragedy of sin.  Each  human posses  a sin nature.  Humans are sinners by birth,  choice,  and practice.  Being married  does not  do away with this bent toward sin and sinful things. Each partner is marred and scarred by sin and this greatly hind-ers  communication.  Unconfessed  and  unforsaken  sin  can  wreak  havoc  on  the home.  Sin breeds shame, guilt, lies,  and  cover-ups. Sin causes fear, timidity,  hurts and  disappointments.  Sin creates  distance between  couples.  Sin brings  bitterness, anger,  resentment,  and  ill will.   Nothing  good can  be said  about  sin.  It destroys communication.  It  breaks  up families.  It scatters  loved ones.  The third enemy of communication is found in James 3:7, "For every kind of beasts, and of birds, and of serpents,  and of things  in the sea,  is tamed  and hath  been tamed  of mankind, but the tongue can no man tame".   The tongue is undisciplined.   Man can control other things in life, but he  fails to discipline himself  long enough to bring the tongue under control.  He fails to guard carefully  and completely  the things that are said.  He fails to  keep a watch over his tongue  so that he doesn't  say the wrong things.   Not only do  we fail to  discipline the tongue  in communication,  but we  fail to  discipline the speaking  opportunities  that  we  encounter.  We  do  not  discipline  ourselves  long enough to turn off the TV,  to stop the music,  to lay down the book or magazine, or to interrupt our busy schedule to communicate sincerely with our mates.  We simply are  undisciplined.   James 3:6 gives  us our fourth  and  final  enemy  that  confronts communication.  There the Bible says that, "The tongue...is set on fire of hell".  The tongue is energized by Satan.  Satan  does not  want the  family to prosper and be in harmony.   He wants the married couple to engage  in arguments, disruptions,  fight-ing's,  and  separations.   The less  we communicate  the more  he likes it.   He is the one that is ultimately behind the harsh,  hurtful words.   He delights in critical,  biting words.  He is happy when we engage in angry and  hurtful communication.  He likes bitterness,  division, pouting,  grudges, unforgiveness, and unbearable silence.  These enemies  seek  to  destroy  and  to  disrupt  the home.   Let's  declare  war  on  these enemies.  Let's determine in our  hearts that we  will not allow these terrible enemies to defeat our marriage.  Remember that, "Communication Is Confronted With Many Enemies". 

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